Arm Chair Mayor: Peter Humphreys- Look like a Town, Spend Like a City!

Revelstoke is like a teenaged girl in grade 8. We are technically a City but really a Town when you compare us to the older kids.

When the inspectors were here for the official population count, the highway was closed and magically we had the population to become a City. To maintain our City status, we spend all of our money on makeup to look like the older kids but because we don’t have the population base we either buy the dollar store stuff or beg our mother to buy the stuff that won’t clump. We ask our friends to help us with our wardrobe but as soon as we get to know them they either leave for bigger opportunities or we chase them away because they are too urban. An indoor pool, splash park and skateboard park just like the big kids have is so critical that we dip into the education fund that Grandma set up for us.

If a developer comes looking to spend money, we present them with the 1000 page family history binder and tell them there will be a test on it tomorrow and can’t understand why they didn’t stay. When we do get some additional revenue, we stop off at Malone’s and the money never makes it home.

Most of our visitors are coming from a City and don’t equate a good quality outdoor adventure with a City and those coming for a City adventure are disappointed that we don’t have the attractions of a City.

I am going to do my part and from hereinafter I am calling our piece of paradise the Town of Revelstoke. May the budget follow.

It’s all in jest of course because I would never claim we “Look like a Town but Spend like a City” and my apologies to all the grade 8 girls.

In my opinion.

Your Arm Chair Mayor,

Peter Humphreys